Golly I'm cross. I'm afraid I'm simply going to have to let rip on my lovely blog otherwise I will absolutely scream the house down and the bloody cat will spray everywhere like he did when Molly got her finger caught in Rupert's clay trap (what on earth she was doing messing about with it goodness only knows, I'm just jolly glad the 12-bore had no cartridges in it at the time).
Anyway. My morning has just been so frustrating I could cry. First of all I had to do the school run because Lara was going off on a two night school trip and was being boringly insistent that I drop her off and kiss her so she wouldn't be homesick. Why a lovely kiss the night before wasn't good enough I don't know - we really should have made her board last September, put some backbone into her.
Well there I was at the school gates a good two hours before I'd normally even be awake, when who comes up to me but Sally Farquarson, bright as a bloody button and smiling fit to frighten the birds. Someone should have a word to her about her addiction to home whitening kits. "Minty dear" she trills, "you couldn't do me the most massive favour and take Lavinia off my hands for the night 3 weeks on Saturday? Only she is so keen to have a sleepover with Lara and it is the Wiltshire's big bash that evening and I'll never get the babysitter to stay until 3am or whenever we eventually roll home". Then she gave a little pause and said "oh... unless you are going of course?". I tell you, I nearly scratched her eyes out!
The Earl and Countess of Wiltshire's party is going to be absolutely fabulous - Milly is doing the flowers and says the whole thing won't give them any change out of 500K - and the silly little bitch knows that Rupert fell out with him over some trivial business matter. Honestly, Rupes had no idea when he put him into Sylvanian Gold that the CEO was going to do a runner to Costa Rica with the proceeds of the round. How WAS he to know? Anyway Johnnie Wiltshire has had a complete sense of humour failure about it, and now I'm going to have to look after bloody Lavinia while Sally goes to the party of the century.
So I smiled at Sally and said "Lara will be so pleased. I think that is the night that the Wales' are coming for dinner but I'm sure Lavinia knows how to behave in those circumstances".
Damn, I thought on my way home, I'm going to have to get them round now. And he is SUCH a bore.
Anyway I've come home, phoned Camilla's new diary girl Julia and of course they can't make that date - which I completely expected, after all the last little dinner we had was organised 7 months in advance. "Oh such a pity" I said. "Oh but you are double booking yourself" bleats Julia brightly "they'll be at the Wiltshire's that night so you'll see them there!"
I'm so humiliated.
Must dash, I've got to book a super duper holiday somewhere far away for that weekend. Venice I think. Or Miami? WHAT a bore.